Happy Halloween my friends. I just got home from work and my back is tired and my eyelids are heavy and I drank and danced a little too much last night (for some idiotic reason) and I could just lay my ass down on the couch and fall straight to sleep right now.
But what I'm going to do instead is slip into a transparent vintage chartreuse chiffon dress over a black slip and some sparkly black tights. Then I'm going to put on a pair of pointy black shoes and some other accessories before I tease my hair up to the cieling and apply sparkly green makeup to my face and body. I will then don a pointy black hat and go gallavanting off into the spooky night on the arm of my black-devil-horned boyfriend to some outrageous party that better be every bit as good as the invitation suggests.
The ornate gothic invitation claims that not only is it the hottest halloween party in NYC, but that "due to the extreme nature and controversy of this presentation, no one will be admitted between 11:30 pm and 11:45 pm" and there are no cameras or video equipment permitted. Now don't that just make ya fuckin curious? This party starts at ten tonight and goes until tomorrow afternoon. So if I fall off the face of the earth please tell my family that I love them.
....
I'm sorry. My latent superstition always gets the best of me: knock on wood baby! I'll be back tomorrow.
This King Missile song just came on my station and I didn't feel right keeping the laughs to myself. Some things are just too true, and it's so good when someone puts it in to words like this.
I am a sensitive artist...
I am a sensitive artist.
Nobody understands me because I am so deep.
In my work I make allusions to books that nobody else has read,
Music that nobody else has heard,
And art that nobody else has seen.
I can't help it
Because I am so much more intelligent
And well-rounded
Than everyone who surrounds me.
I stopped watching tv when I was six months old
Because it was so boring and stupid
And started reading books
And going to recitals
And art galleries.
I don't go to recitals anymore
Because my hearing is too sensitive
And I don't go to art galleries anymore
Because there are people there
And I can't deal with people
Because they don't understand me.
I stay home
Reading books that are beneath me,
And working on my work,
Which no one understands
I am sensitive...
I am a sensitive artist...
_______________________________
There are a lot of those here in NY. Sensitive artists. They annoy me. My copy machine stopped working during a large copy job the other day and I said "Hm. It's being a sensitive artist." My friend Harry thought that was pretty funny. I'll have to use it again.
I rarely pick up the paper before I get on the train in the morning. I usually read a book on the train and wait until I'm at work to read the news online when I have downtime. But this morning I forgot my book at home, so I grabbed an edition of the Daily [Sp]ews on the way.
What a mess. What a complete and total catastrophe this war on Iraq has become. Bush says that the constant killing and devestation is "the grim price of U.S. success in Iraq..." If this is success, I would hate to see what failure looks like. And all that imbecile in the White House can say about it is: "The more progress we make on the ground, the more free the Iraqis become, the more electricity that's available, the more jobs are available, the more kids that are going to school, the more desperate these killers become." He says the attacks are designed "to create fear and chaos." And what were the purpose of all the bombs we dropped? To create a festive and prosperous atmosphere? Bush is a real dick.
It's not really news if you think about it: hatred and violence is everywhere. What's new? Check out these sick, demented human beings teaching their children hatred and intolerance by traveling all the way from motherfuckin Topeka, Kansas to New York and sending their kids to stand out in front of a Long Island school with signs that say things like "God Hates Fag Enablers" and "God Blew Up The Shuttle" (I'm still trying to figure out why god would blow up the shuttle because of gays) and "Thank God for Sept. 11." (Because there were gays in the WTC? I never...!) Why are these people and their kids standing outside a NY school with hateful signs? Because of the horrendous hazing that has gone on among members of that school, which somehow these psychotic "Christians" (which I think is an insult to decent Christians) have blamed on the acceptance of gays in society. They have somehow tied gays into a myriad of issues and blamed everything on them in one fell swoop. One of the quotes had this idiot saying:
"when you teach children that it's okay to indulge in any kind of sex act that they like...that it's okay to be gay, it is inevitable that they will end up being violent and doing things that they shouldn't."
First I'd like to ask this person if their brain damage is all pervasive or if it only effects the portion of their brain which processes logic and rational thoughts. Second, I'd like to ask if they think that teaching their children hatred and intolerance is better for the child than sex education and learning to accept and hopefully embrace diversity. Instead they will make this bizarre connection in the child's mind between violence and sexual orientation? Sexual orientation, of course having absolutely nothing to do with the real issue at hand and that which they are supposedly protesting, which is the violent "hazing" perpetrated by football players against team mates as some kind of horrifying right of passage. Somehow they have tied this together with homosexuality? These idiots from Kansas think that the reason these football players violently raped and abused team mates is because they were taught to accept gays and because they were educated about sex or because the ARE gay and they were told that it's okay? What planet did these people come from, because I didn't think Kansas was THAT far away.
The discovery channel just scared me worse than any horror movie, ever. Killer Ants. They are showing Siafu right now. A frightening ant creature native to Africa that is blind and will eat absolutely any damn thing that moves. They hunt all day and sometimes all night, forming long, terrifying processions of frenzied, methodical murder and the endless consumption of flesh. All they do is feed. I read a sci-fi book one time about giant killer ants that was damn scary, and this reminded me of that. If they were any larger it seems like they could be a serious threat to mankind. They started crawling up on this sleeping man and piercing his flesh with their horrible pinchers. Luckily he woke up before they could overtake him by the thousands and eat him alive. He chased them with fire to get them off and away. I can't imagine living with the fear that I may be consumed by an army of deadly ants while I sleep. The only reason that there is no massive termination of these creatures is that they apparently assist the farmers by eating every single living thing that could possibly harm crops. I am going to have some nightmares...
The Frightening World of AntsA small brown speckled frog hops through the leaves of the Riverine Forest floor. It creeps forward for a few seconds and swallows whole a bright green grasshopper that was sitting beside a flower. It hops again, this time misjudged, rubs its face in pain and tries to hop again, lands on its back and is swallowed in a rippling mass of dark red bodies. Ten minutes later, nothing is left of the frog, but the four-inch wide highway of red ants remains.
Biting red ants, or "Siafu" in Kiswahili live in colonies, but unlike most ants, do not have a permanent home. The ants range from 1 to 15 mm long, hunt at night, and hide in a hole in the ground or in a tree during the day, They shift locations as the insect, and sometimes frog-like, prey is exhausted. The Riverine Forests of Serengeti, being dark and moist, have Siafu hunting all night long and all day as well. They form either highways as they travel from their lair to the hunting field or fans when they are actively hunting.
Siafu hunt by sensing the carbon dioxide that insects and animals breath out. If a person is playful and brave, or just plain stupid, they can tease the Siafu by blowing on the trails of ants and watching them burst into activity, pincers held high, looking for prey.
Siafu nests of a few days old are typically a hole in a tree with a thick pile of insect bodies piled up outside the opening. While the bulk of the Siafu's food is insects, they can eat a small animal such as a shrew or a frog if it happens to get caught. Some people have claimed to see Siafu moving by forming terrifying rolling balls as large as a basketball. In truth, these swarms of Siafu do occur, but they are normally a mass of Siafu surrounding and biting a prey animal, and are seldom more than a few inches across.
People claim that these fierce little warriors can climb up inside the trunk of an elephant and bite. It is doubtful that anyone has been close enough to witness this, but when the Siafu are particularly active, such as after a rain storm, you will never find elephants in the same Riverine Forest.
Siafu, though aggressive and painful, are not at all a bad thing, even for people. If you live in Africa and Siafu swarm into your house, they eat all of the other ants, roaches, spiders, and everything else that slithers crawls or creeps, and then they go, leaving you in peace. Peace, that is, as long you have somewhere to stay for a day or two.
I have to say I honestly don't understand why anyone would arrest and fine a man for jumping into Niagara Falls. I mean, is it not punishment enough that the man is suicidal to begin with and that he endured the unenviable experience of plummeting hundreds of feet in freezing cold water? Maybe the law could be a little lenient on the guy? It just seems so excessive to charge him thousands of dollars for doing something that didn't hurt anyone except his own stupid, pathetic self. I feel bad for the guy that he was so hopeless that he threw himself into the falls. I just don't think it's fair to punish him so harshly. I'm sure after his journey down the falls all he wanted was a nice warm bed and someone to be nice to him. But no. They throw his ass in the slammer so he can spend a cozy night in a jail cell. I really don't understand that. I mean, there's no doubt he's an idiot and had no business hurling himself into a deadly force of nature that way, but you can't punish someone just for being an idiot.
I went over to my boy's work today and had lunch with him at the tiny Japanese restaurant next to his office. I hadn't been to that restaurant since last summer and I forgot how tender and delicious their steak hibachi is. Neither of us finished our food and ended up wrapping up the other half of our lunch and taking it to go.
I took the subway back to my office, only one stop, but I was feeling particularly lazy and it's cold out so that's my excuse. There was a homeless gentleman laying on the ground at the entrance to the uptown platform and as I walked by he propped up on an elbow and said "do you have any food?" I said "yes I do" and handed him my little paper sack with the leftover steak and vegetables and rice from my lunch. He was so happy it made me want to cry. He said "oh thank you! God bless you! And God bless your family!" I said "God bless you too" and went on to catch the train. And you know, all I could think about was how I hope he likes Japanese food and how bad I felt that there wasn't a fork in the bag...I mean I felt really, genuinely guilty that he may have looked and said "what is this and how the hell am I supposed to eat it?" I'm a fucking freak. I'm sure that once he figured out how to get it from the container to his mouth he probably really enjoyed it because I sure enjoyed the other half.
I hope I see him again sometime. He seemed like a sweet man. It's really heartbreaking how many people are stuck out there on the street, hungry and cold. Just doesn't make sense.
That movie "My Stepmother is an Alien," with Dan Akroyd and Kim Basinger and the "this one time, at band camp..." girl from American Beauty (Sarah Green?), is really freakin funny. I remember watching it when I was a kid, but haven't seen it since then and I gotta tell you, it's good fun. Such a happy ending...>sigh< they just don't make movies like that anymore.
Exxon Mobil is evil. I just saw an ad that they put out, with no real purpose whatsoever except to spew propaganda about how valuable and exciting their oil drilling technology is. They actually had the gall to film all the beautiful places where they stick their disgusting fucking oil rigs and brag in their ad about how fantastic it is that they're building newer and more technologically sound oil rigs all over the world every single day. As if this is something to be proud of.
I have personal beef with Exxon Mobil. When I was a little kid my parents both worked vigilantly (my father an attorney and my mom a paralegal) on a class action lawsuit against Mobil. This lawsuit had hundreds of plaintiffs in Orange County, California, alone, where their company had spilled thousands of gallons of toxic oil and caused hundreds of people to have life threatening illnesses and horrendous cancerous ailments. They operated their business day after day, polluting everything around them, dismissing claims with a flick of the wrist and flagrantly ignoring the outrage of the people who they had victimized.
And these same disgusting motherfuckers have the nerve to be proud about what they do. Planting oil refineries in some of the most serene and untouched landscapes in the world, devastating wildlife and the environment, literally destroying everything they touch and simultaneously siphoning millions of dollars out of people with outrageous oil prices. What the hell do they have to be proud of, those evil sons of bitches?
Read Bastard Out of Carolina in three days. Started Friday morning, finished a few minutes ago. That book took the mutherfuckin wind out of me. Blew me to hell and back. Had me thinking so hard and caring so much about the characters that I was trembling and my jaw felt tight like I was going to break down at the end. Crazy story. Painful. Beautiful. Amazingly written.
Today has been a lucky day. All kinds of good things have happened. Went out last night and got a little bit tanked, had weirdass dreams all night and this morning, woke up full of stories and musings. Went out junk shopping with Kathleen in Caroll Gardens. Found tons of cool stuff in a little place called "Treasures". Coats three dollars a piece. Nice coats, Limited, Ann Taylor, Betsey Johnson pants, two bucks, slick skirts for work, two bucks a piece. Found the Phantom of the Opera soundtrack for fifty cents and a book for fifty cents...then Kathleen kept talking about how she needed a new tv because the picture on hers sucks and lo and behold when we walked out of my apartment this evening to go to Rite Aid to pick up photos, there was a nice looking tv sitting outside. Good compact size, but still big enough. We brought it into the house and plugged it in and it works and has a real decent picture. What luck. Then we accidentally got something for free at Rite Aid. That was a lucky mistake which we didn't bother to rectify. Made a kickass spaghetti sauce from scratch when we got home. Couldn't have turned out better.
I didn't even have to use my A-K. I have to say it was a good day.
We will not rest? We will not tire? Who is he talking to? Oh, that's right "Republican loyalists". Casualty vampires. No rest, no sleep for blood sucking bastards out to conquer the world, sidestepping the destruction left in their wake.
Remove this danger from civilization? And just how, exactly, does Dubya plan to remove danger and terror from civilization when it has been a part of civilization since the dawn of time? (By committing suicide? That might be a good start...) Is he going to remove terror from all corners of the earth, or just from the United States (apparently, the most precious and important place ON earth) and countries that have oil or offer resistance to his master plan of world domination? He definitely must irradicate terror from those places, otherwise, what reason do we have to be in those countries committing all kinds of murder and mayhem? I'm sure that "terror" is dwindling from existence at an alarming rate. I'm just sure of it. I mean, don't tell me we've spent all those billions of dollars on nothing.
So tell me Mr. President, what did you babble?
I like margaritas, with extra tequila, chilled and served in a blue martini glass with a lime on the side. I like quesadillas with lots of melted cheese and salsa verde. Something about white cheese and green chiles is just a match made in heaven. If you add sour cream in to the mix, the sky is the limit. You know what else I love? French bread sliced and toasted with a piece of sharp white cheddar and a dap of olive dip. Cheese is good with everything. Seriously. Everything.
It's one of those nights. I took a nice long walk around my neighborhood once it got good and dark. The weather is not too warm, not too cold. Perfect for a stroll at night. I found a medium size stretched canvas leaning up against a trashcan. It had been sketched on with pencil, some silly drawing of a big eyed, long lashed girl with a pair of over sized sunglasses drifting off somewhere to the right of her head. Obviously, the artist was disgusted with the hideous initial drawing and opted to throw the canvas out rather than be bothered with continuing to use it. I saw it as a perfectly good surface to create on and I felt lucky to have found such a thing on my walk. So I picked it up and thought about what I would do with it all the way home.
I got it home and painted on it. Took a cloth and a few different colors and went to town... in circular motions creating an interesting tye dye effect. What I really wanted to do was test out all the colors I have to paint my apartment with, which I'll start doing this weekend. They looked nice on the canvas. A burnt burgundy orange, canary yellow, powdery lavendar...the canvas served as a good drawing board for my ideas.
After that I fixed my chilled margarita and settled in to The Daily Show with Jon Stewart which made me laugh until I nearly pee'd my pants. He had this segment making fun of all the yuppies in Seattle who were all up in arms about the proposed ten cent coffee tax. Oh boofuckinghoo. Poor yuppies and yippies and angst wracked grungers all out of sorts that they might be taxed an extra ten cents on their precious lattes. Meanwhile in New York we pay nearly ten cents for every dollar spent. (I can bitch, but I'm the idiot who moved here.) No really, (I can be sympathetic) I'm sure it poses some economical problems for individuals, especially for a part of the country that is going through rough financial times as much as the rest of us. But what if that money will help their overall economy and make a difference for schools in that area, maybe they should just buck up and try weaning themselves off the crack for once OR pay ten cents more for their already outrageously priced coffee drinks to benefit society... The skit showed Seattleites throwing coffee into the Sound in parody of the Boston Tea Party and other hysterical antics like hippie chicks taking their shirts off to protest the tax and great rejoicing when the law failed to pass. Assholes. I was on the floor laughing. I went to the Daily Show filming one time and it was fabulous entertainment. We were supposed to go last week, but my flakey friends fucked it up...I won't talk about it lest I get my underwear in a wad all over again. Anyway, I think those people in Seattle are pretty mutherfucking stupid.
... to the couch and about ten more minutes, BED. It's calling me. Mariaaaa...You neeed sleeeep...
You'll have to excuse my string of angry tangents about idiots these last couple of days. The news is just enough to send a person off the deep end. I have to get all this stuff off my chest though, otherwise it festers. And we don't want that. If I let things fester I become like a ticking time bomb. Mayhem just waiting to happen.
This situation in Guantanamo Bay is so unbelievably messed up.
"Amanda Williamson, spokeswoman in the Washington office of the Geneva-based International Committee of the Red Cross[,said]:
'After more than 18 months of captivity, the internees have no idea about their fate, no means of recourse through any legal mechanism. They have been placed in a legal vacuum, a legal black hole. This, for the ICRC, is unacceptable...Clearly when you look at Guantanamo today, that crucial element -- the lack of a legal framework -- remains unresolved.'
The United States says the detainees are 'enemy combatants' but not prisoners of war under the Geneva Conventions. It reserves the right to try them before military tribunals but has not yet brought any to trial (emphasis added).
White House spokesman Scott McClellan on Friday repeated the U.S. position that it treats the detainees consistently with the requirements of the conventions. "They are enemy combatants. We are at war on terrorism.'"
Aaah yes, we are at war on terrorism. A term under which fear, insanity and gross injustice have reigned free. If terrorist is just another word for "one who arbitrarily murders the innocent," then what the hell is George Bush? Yet somehow, we still have not identified who those terrorists are (cough *Saudi Arabians* ahem), but we are just rounding up "suspects" and tossing them like dogs into a prison which lies beyond the scope of any known legal recourse, to wait, maybe forever, to be tried for their alleged crimes. The problem is, the United States government can do this to anyone they choose and there never has to be a case; just a nameless, faceless, prisoner without a chance in hell.
You know that out of the 600 "enemy combatants" shacked up in Guantanamo, a large number of them are probably 100 percent innocent of any crime. Does it matter? No. Will they have a chance to prove their innocence? Probably not. Is this okay with the U.S. government and the people who preach democracy, freedom, and the right of each individual to a fair trial, the right to face their accusers, the right to an attorney...? I guess so. I guess it's okay. Because our government is refusing to address the issue and refusing to practice anything that they preach is the foundation of this country (freedom and humane treatment of human beings and the entitlement to use the legal system to exonerate yourself from any crimes that you are accused of). Oh wait, but they are "enemy combatants," "accused terrorists," they're not human beings. What was I thinking? Sorry, continue with the torture and degradation.
Who the fuck made this asshole Superman? Why are we flying about the earth purportedly "saving" everyone else's miserable ass countries by placing huge judgment on their leaders and politics and then asserting that we must do something about their condition. Can we please, for one minute, stop wasting time and money on trying to take over the world and start worrying about the serious problems facing us in this country. Hey Bush. Stop being a fucking "hero" and do something for the American people you impetuous imbecile. You're the President of the United States, not the President of Planet Earth, okay? Or at least if you want to help others, do it out of genuine compassion rather than some political agenda or corporate interest.
What about this stupid fucking quote: "Clearly, the Castro regime will not change by its own choice," Bush told a gathering at the White House Rose Garden. "But Cuba must change."
Oh yes, if they won't change into what we want them to immediately, then we are going to have to change Cuba FOR THEM. With threats and bombs. AMERICA IS THE ONE THAT NEEDS CHANGE YOU FUCKING MORON! First order of business, get rid of you and your whole useless corrupt dispicable administration and start taking responsibility for the incredible damage that we've done to others instead of doing more damage, wreaking more havoc. Why don't we start healing our own economy and government and future, and those that we've destroyed elsewhere in the world, before creating more costly catastrophes. Then maybe we can help some other people, in a humane and reasonable manner - not by kicking their doors down and blowing the holy shit out of them. I know that's a new concept to you and your war hungry pals.
I don't know what to do with this article that I just read. I will not rest until I have sufficiently vented. I simply cannot fathom that the stupid fucks at the Roman Catholic Church would have the nerve to claim that not only do condoms not protect a person in any way from HIV or other sexually transmitted diseases, but that condoms actually pose a danger to people by making them more promiscuous. They might as well just hand out cyanide pills and start telling people that they're candy. Those stupid fucks. Are they not the most sexually retarded organization alive, the Catholic Church? Jehovah's Witnesses are starting to seem reasonable in comparison! Wrought with sexual scandal and massive coverups, and then this???
Condoms do not promote promiscuity. There are a lot of other things out there that promote promiscuity, but condoms definitely are not one of them.
Let's review the logic of the RCC: people who don't use condoms are always chaste, which would lead one to believe that if you DO use condoms you're probably a slut. Since condoms do not prevent pregnancy or sexually transmitted diseases, the distribution of condoms actually serves to promote and spread Aids and pregnancy. People who don't use condoms are not promiscuous. And those who do not use condoms do not have unwanted pregnancies or Aids? So it's just better not to use condoms, because if you do you're a slut and a sinner and if you don't use condoms it won't make a difference anyway (but at least you won't be a slutty sinner). And if you do happen to have an unwanted pregnancy, you are not allowed to have an abortion or else you are a murderer?
How do they propose that we prevent Aids, STDs and unwanted pregnancy, and at the same time, irradicate the practice of abortion? Confusing? Well, yes. Can someone please make sense of it, because my little brain can't. Somehow, a lot of important focus points in this issue have escaped these idiots.
I am so disgusted with this religion and these people that would perpetuate a dangerous lie in order to protect some ancient doctrine that means NOTHING, meanwhile dismissing hard learned research and evidence that shows how truly wrong they are. It is really disturbing.
Here are some of the more mind blowing portions of the article:
"The Archbishop of Nairobi, Raphael Ndingi Nzeki told the program: 'AIDS...has grown so fast because of the availability of condoms.'"
"The Roman Catholic church opposes any form of artificial contraception -- particularly condoms, which it says promote promiscuity." This! From the biggest perverts the world has ever known.
"'The Aids virus is roughly 450 times smaller than the spermatozoon,' Cardinal Alfonso Lopez Trujillo, president of the Vatican Pontifical Council for the Family, told the program...The spermatozoon can easily pass through the 'net' that is formed by the condom."
Somebody tell this buffoon that a condom is not a "net" through which all sorts of things can pass. That is the point of a condom. Is this mere ignorance/stupidity or does it reach farther into the realm of utter and complete insanity?
(Note: This entry has been modified from its original version, in case there was not enough bitching the first time around)
It feels so quiet with all of my guests gone. First it was Kathleen and Charles in the interim between apartments, then Darcie and Tom for their visit. All of a sudden, the house is empty and I'm all alone. I love my friends, but it feels kind of good not to have to entertain anyone or worry about whether or not I'm ever going to get around to all of the things that have been put on hold while socializing. Bills to pay, house to clean...
I'm half way through a couple of loads of laundry and decided to relax on the couch and see what's on the tv. Something I have watched very little of this summer. But I'm definitely not complaining. My dad chucked our tv into a dumpster when I was a little kid and I have since been very weary of it. We later acquired another tv by accident when my little sister needed to go to the bathroom so badly while waiting in the car outside of a grocery store that my mother took her in the bushes by the dumpster out back so that she could go. It was there that they discovered a brand spanking new television that someone probably ditched during some sort of dubious or perhaps criminal activity. We watched movies with our vhs for years, but tv was never an even remotely dominant facet of our environment growing up.
I was at my sister's house recently and she said to me "don't tell mom and dad, but we have a tv." That's pretty funny. I purchased my first very own television less than a year ago and I love it. I hate commercials with a passion. Think they are just so blatantly insulting to a person's intelligence (as is much of the regular broadcasting), but I like a lot of shows that are on and I love movies. My boyfriend works in the television/movie industry, so I consider us pretty hip to what's going on in that arena.
Anyway, tonight I'm watching The Bachelor for the very first time. It's hilarious. In a way, I think it portrays these girls (and sort of, women in general) in this really shmarmie, demeaning light, where they are all subservient to the whims of this one man, this "Adam," if you will. They're crying and arguing and flirting and finessing, and doing every last goddamn thing that they can do to beat eachother out at this game. The game of who can win this "perfect" man. It's a fucking joke. And at the same time, it's fetching entertainment. I have to say that these girls stoop to looking like real idiots sometimes, as much as they are sort of charming and you can see why they were chosen for the show. I also think it portrays "The Bachelor" as a complete slut as he hops from girl to girl, kissing and making out and "harboring a connection" with each one. I wouldn't even want to be with a guy after that experience. After knowing that he'd kissed and caressed and gotten intimate with every single other girl in the house. It's just too damn weird. Apparently, this is the steamiest season ever and Mr. Perfect has never been more perfect. The girls have never been quite so beside themselves and tripping over their own feet to get a minute with him.
Now I've seen a few of these shows. I have to admit that I did watch "Joe Millionaire" and even "The Bachelorette." I have seen my share of "The Real World," "Road Rules," "American Idol" and I even watched Celebrity Survivor once. I have also watched my share of "Fear Factor" and other such trash. These shows always amaze me with how far people are willing to go in front of a camera. (I guess that's the point.) Someone (don't recall who) said "It's 1984 and the whole Big Brother scenario, but in a way that no one ever expected. We are now inviting the cameras into our home. People are fighting for the opportunity to have their life captured on national television." Back when old Mr. Orwell wrote that book, I'll bet he didn't really think about that. Who could have predicted the reality tv phenomenon as we now know it?
I did read this bit on the smoking gun about how the cast and crew of the Bachelor trashed the Malibu home that they rented for the filming of the show (before I'd ever actually seen it), so it's kind of interesting to see the home in question. All I can think now is how irresponsible of everyone involved that they disrespected someone else's home that way after making many promises that they would treat the house with earnest care.
Speaking of houses and care, it's probably about time for me to get back to my chores.
I am so tired of this bullshit. If I hear Bush or anyone else say one more time that it was worth the billions of dollars and thousands of lives lost in Iraq to remove Saddam Hussein because "the world is a safer place without him," while dismissing the deceitful conduct of the administration who sold their fabrications lock stock and barrel to the American people, I am going to scream my bloody head off. The fucker isn't even dead and there were no WMD! I can't take it anymore.
The world would be a safer place without about half of the people that inhabit it. North Korea would be a safer place without Kim Jong-il. The United States would be safer without 25,000 gun related deaths every year. My city would be safer without all the murderers and rapists. But you know what? We can't bomb the shit out of NYC to get rid of them, despite the fact that criminals of all types victimize innocent people on a daily basis. Aside from the fact that Iraqis are currently not any more "liberated" than they were this time last year, on top of that it turns out there are no weapons of mass destruction, so even if Saddam was a terrifying threat to his own people, that does not warrant us spending ALL OF OUR HARD EARNED MONEY on killing those people who we are supposedly helping, meanwhile depriving our own country of money that we desperately need to fight our own fucked condition with regard to schools, healthcare, and myriad other dire needs in our own country. Not to be selfish, but at least if I'm going to spend my HARD EARNED MONEY on helping people, I could feel confident that I'm not murdering those same people that I am "helping"! As Jon Stewart recently said with regard to Bush and his "tree thinning" plans "why is it that whenever this guy wants to 'save' something, he feels it is necessary to kill half of it?"
So stop with the fucking bullshit artist antics Bush. You're a lying scumbag. Just admit it. You've effectively fucked my unborn children into mass debt and you haven't improved the quality of life for a single goddamn Iraqi in the process. Thanks for nothing asshole. What? What's that you say? You have a meeting with the heads of all the corporations you "serve" to decide how you can steal everything else that the American people have? Oh I'm sorry, I'll let you get back to that.
"As a matter of principle, I never attend the first annual anything.
Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.
Honesty may be the best policy, but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.
I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.
I'm not concerned about all hell breaking loose, but that a PART of hell will break loose... it'll be much harder to detect.
Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong.
There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past.
Weather forecast for tonight: dark.
Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?
Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just stale bread to begin with.
"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?
Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.
Ever notice that anyone going slower than you is an idiot, but anyone going faster is a maniac?
The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American recently passed each other going in opposite directions."
-George Carlin
Hello my name is Maria. And I'm addicted to ebay.
I can't get enough. You can find anything on there. ANYTHING! (Am I just a late bloomer on this one? Has everyone else already gone through their ebay phase?) I guess not, because that place is hoppin'. There is so much good shit on there. I have to be very careful and super selective about what I bid on, but, omigod, I just found the perfect turquoise leather clutch to go with the hand painted turquoise leather sandals that Alexa gave me for my birthday. I'm freakin out. I have been looking, and found not a single purse that would really go, and then, there it was, in all it's glory: butter soft, utterly unmarred, turquoise blue leather. Simple. No hardware except for the zipper. Aaaah. It will be mine. Oh yes. It will be mine. I'm having a virtual orgasm at this very moment just thinking about it.
Anyway, this is what I've been doing with myself during my spare time. Spare, not being a huge lot, but still, I feel like I have spent a few hours shopping in a hundred different stores, and I have scarcely had to exert more energy than the occasional leg shift in my seat. So this is how asses get so fat. The internet is a dangerous thing. Aside from the fact that it is irritating how much virtual garbage it produces, you can obtain just about anything via the internet.
Just the other day, Kathleen presented me with a birthday present. A beautiful necklace that her mother brought back from New Zealand, made of stunning pieces of shell that are unique to that region of the world. On the tag, I noticed there was a website address. It was at that moment I realized that nothing is sacred anymore thanks to the worldwide web. You can probably get a necklace just like that on the internet. Used to be that when someone brought you something from the other side of the earth, it was special. Because you couldn't go there and get it yourself. But now you can just log on and punch in your credit card number and get the same mutherfucking thing. And now that this earth has become one giant unstoppable consumer fed machine, things have just become things. That doesn't mean they're not good things that we don't all desire or somehow feel that we need, but it just seems to me that the internet has only increased the advertising/brainwashing effort and effect on human beings as much as it has proved to be a huge advantage and a massive leap for civilization.
We were talking the other day about what our generation and this particular point in time will be remembered as in the future. What will they call us, someone asked. I mean, so much has happened. Since I was a child. The first and second gulf wars, the Bush, Clinton, Bush era, the technological shock and awe phase, September 11th, the (still somewhat concealed) master plan of the U.S. government to conquer the world and allow corporations to rule the earth...will it be called "Media Madness" or "Century of the Cell Phone?" Seems like cell phones have just become an appendage to each person's body. If you don't have one, then what the fuck are you going to do? NOT talk on the phone? That's preposterous. (I had mine shut off and now I use it as an alarm clock.)
Celebrity "news" has become more prominent than real news. People care more about whether Jen and Ben are still together or where they went shopping this week, than the fact that horrible shit is happening all over the place and humanity itself has evolved into a catastrophe. (I won't deny that I'm a perpetrator). If you're "liberal," you're considered to be a quack in this day and age. And would you believe, that George Carlin is just as relevant now as he was in the 80s? One of my alltime faves: "These conservatives are really something aren't they? These pro-lifers... An unborn fetus is a sacred life, but once it's born, if it grows up to be a doctor, you might just have to kill it! Unborn fetuses are sacred, but once you're born they don't want to have another fuckin thing to do with you! No childcare, no health insurance, no nothing. They don't want to have anything to do with you until you're 18 and then they're happy to have you so that you can become a dead soldier!" God that was good. A genius and a half.
Despite all the dreck, I think our time will be remembered as the Dawn of the Internet. The internet phenomenon wins the prize. I love it and I hate it. But mostly, I just love it.