June 18, 2003

Gleaming Blade

I had this really funky ass dream last night and I just had to write about it.

On my way home last night on the train I started reading this book "Five To Die" about Charles Manson. Apparently, the beginning of the book which graphically depicts the murders of those five people in the Tate mansion, effected my subconscious psyche more than I thought.

Last night I had this dream that I was still with my really scary ex-boyfriend but he looked more like Charles Manson than anything. He also had a really big knife and I couldn't get away from him. I had all this money in my purse and he kept stealing from me (this is probably because in real life I had been carrying around a large amount of cash that I hadn't found the time to deposit into the bank). When I would confront him about it in the dream he just kept lying to me. I was so afraid he was going to kill me and I kept trying to think of a way to escape. I had all these flashes in the dream of being murdered in the goriest fashion.

I finally escaped from him and then I was in my apartment and everytime I would go to the door to make sure it was locked it would be unlocked again. I saw him driving up to my apartment in a truck and I was frantically running around trying to lock the doors and the windows and for some reason in the dream I realized that he was not going to stop hunting me until he had sliced me into pieces with that big knife.

The thing about this particular ex-boyfriend is that he had a serious anger management problem and when I left him I had to run away in the middle of the night. He was not happy about it and he continued to make all kinds of threatening phone calls and send ugly emails for quite awhile after I was gone. He even once threatened to kill me and my new boyfriend at one point, but I really didn't believe him because he just liked to rant and rave until he got it out of his system. He had been to jail before and he was way too much of a wuss to ever go back, so he refrained from doing most things that would have landed him in the slammer ever again. But still, I think I was lucky to get out of there when I did because he had a tendency to become very violent and I had already endured as much as I could take.

Anyway, you know how it is when you dream, there are so many minute details that make everything so real, but they all become a blur once you try to grasp them and recount the whole thing. I have GOT to stop reading shit that gives me these crazy nightmares.

Posted by Maria at June 18, 2003 01:45 PM | TrackBack
Comments

Doood, that freaked me out.

Posted by: :: jozjozjoz :: at June 18, 2003 06:26 PM

I'm sorry joz. I didn't mean to freak anybody out. Sometimes I forget that other people don't think about this morbid stuff as much as I do. Now that I read the post over it is a little scary. I'm tellin you, I woke up a couple of times scared and then I would fall back asleep and keep having that warped dream. Anywaaay. :o)

Posted by: Maria at June 18, 2003 06:50 PM

Now, if you owned a gun in your dreams, you could have shot him, multiple times, and then woke up and told your current boyfriend about it, thereby re-asserting your dominance in the relationship and, coincidentaly of course, scaring the living bejeebus out of him.

He'd probably also clean the pad, feed the cats, and make you breakfast for at least a week..:)

Posted by: evilmike at June 18, 2003 07:46 PM

hehe. Unfortunately, he's already fully aware of my morbid interests and weird dreams.

He always says the same thing: "Sigue reading scary stories..." That basically means "keep it up." He jokes "if I ever wind up dead or missing, you know who did it" (pointing at me)

I really wouldn't hurt a fly. I would smash the crap out of a cockroach or a mosquito though. (And I'd shoot, if attacked, in a heartbeat).

Posted by: Maria at June 18, 2003 08:08 PM

Ah, Charlie Manson; just a little light reading! Maybe you should pick up some "Winnie the Pooh" or something like that; then your worst nightmare would be getting stuck in the honey pot. Come to think of it, that sounds like most of MY dreams ;)

Mike, don't ENCOURAGE her man! Guns don't kill people, pissed off women kill people! I dread the thought of any of my ex-girlfriends being armed!! Come to think of it, my ex currently works security, now rides a bike and bought a gun. Glad she's all the way in Boston!! Look out Choses, lesbian on the warpath! Hee hee...

Posted by: lee at June 18, 2003 10:44 PM