I feel so bummed out man. My roommate is a lunatic who is making my life a nightmare. I hate her. I really do. I know that is "a strong word" and an even stronger sentiment, but that is all I can feel towards her right now. It has been a long and hellish union, our living together. It is amazing how long seven months can become when you are being subjected to a manipulative, controlling and incredibly stupid and irritating person the entire time. It's almost like you wish someone would just come along and spare you the misery.
Honestly, I want to cry right now. The tears are teetering at the rims of my eyes and my jaw feels like it is going to burst into flames. Not because I hate her so much, though last night I did cry because I wanted to take her and strangle the shit out of her. Right now I am so angry at my boyfriend because all he can do everytime I argue with her is criticize the way I dealt with it. It really doesn't help. Then today he has the nerve to say "if you want a boyfriend who is just going to tell you 'oh great job!' then I am not the one..." That made me feel awful. I didn't ask for a gold star for my actions, but I definately didn't need the criticism when I am already stressed out enough about the whole situation. It just made me feel ten times worse.
It seems like a lot of the time he takes the contrary position because he thinks if he doesn't criticize me then no one will, and someone has got to do it, because everyone can't agree with me and think I am right (even though I am obviously right when it comes to this situation with my roommate - I think even she knows that), but the things he says just hurt my feelings and make me feel like he is being really unsupportive.
In his mind he is just trying to give me good advice. In my mind he is beating me about the head.
Posted by Maria at January 14, 2003 05:36 PM | TrackBack